TODAY WAS A SHITTY DAY.
even though i've only been awake for 4 hours of it.
deep breath.
you will not BELIEVE everything that's happened!
firstly, i woke up cos the dratted house phone wouldn't stop ringing. thank goodness i woke up though cos it was Chels asking about tutorial balloting.
so anyway, i realised during the convo that my gums had been bleeding overnight again.
nevermind, nothing new, i thought.
so i carried on, tried doing my balloting and ranking. and stupid cors acted up on me, i just
couldn't reselect my tutorial slots.
after that was over, i cooked lunch.
cos i realised my stomach was dreadfully empty. instant porridge was the choice for the day since i didn't want anything too messy to clean up.
OMG WRONG CHOICE MAN.
the cooking went well, perfect. the porridge boiled, i'd put in just the right amount of water into the pot and it was turning out fine.
until i decided to put sesame oil in my porridge to make it tastier.
bloody hell absolute wrong choice of the century.
the stupid bottle was difficult to cap back. so there i was shoving down with all my might on the bottle cap to close it, when woosh it slipped out of my hands and went crashing onto the kitchen floor.
THE STUPID BOTTLE SMASHED INTO PIECES AND THE OIL WAS EVERYWHERE.
i just stood there for a full minute wondering what the hell had happened.
then when it sunk in, what had happened, i wanted to burst into tears.
yes, silly thing to do i know. i mean, fat lot of good tears will do to the mess right. but there was glass all over and the oil was just pooling up there on the floor and some had spilt onto my legs as well and i was just like, ohshit.
after morosely fishing out the big pieces of glass from the gigantic mess and throwing them into the ntuc plastic bag i had the sense to rummage out, i decided to go eat my lunch first before trying to clean up.
threw several pieces of tissue onto oil before eating, hoping that it'd soak up most of the oil and i could start sweeping the shards once i was done with lunch.
no such luck though. there was too much oil. so i had to kneel on the stupid floor and mop up the mess with more tissue. at this point i was cussing my eyeballs out.
so when the oil had more or less been mopped up, i decided to try to sweep the bits of glass up.
but i couldn't find the bloody broom anywhere!
called my dad up wanting to cry already, and he said "oh i know where the broom is already! it's in Carol's room. try the dustbin." my reaction was a shrill screech and my dad was like, "alright calm down, girl. so after you get the broom and sweep up everything, you take a bit of liquid from the toilet and water and use the mop and blahblahblah.." at this point barely anything was going in as i just numbly nodded and said "okay" several times.
as my dad said, the broom was in Carol's dustbin. like, hello. why would anyone in their right mind put a broom in the dustbin????
came back down, swept up the glass bits, poured Ajax on the floor and sloshed water over it, swept the mop right over several times and i sniffed the patch before me. it still smelt like crap, so i poured even more Ajax over. it didn't smell any better so i was like, whatever lah. i'd poured two capfuls on the floor already, i thought mom and dad wouldn't be happy if they found out i'd emptied two bottles of things in one day - the BRANDNEW bottle of sesame oil and the Ajax floor cleaning liquid.
and did i tell you, i had happily forgotten i'd spilt oil on myself too up until the point when i was sadly eating my ill-fated porridge. i'd put my arm on my knee in my usual samsui-woman way when my arm began slipping off my knee. i thought i was just getting weak from lack of food or something so i propped it back again. only to have it promptly slip off again. it was then when i realised there was oil on my knee and i'd just effectively smeared oil all over my arm. well done Kelly.
back to my cleaning up. it took me several splashes of water and swipes of my mop across the floor to finally get the oil all off.
i decided to take a nice break before going to wash the plates and clothes that had oil and bathe and all. so came to my laptop and turned on iTunes and went online and all.
when i decided to start cleaning up again, i brought the plate to the by-now-dry-and-clean kitchen and put it in the sink. and turned the tap on.
and guess what?
you will SO not believe this, but there was NO WATER. no water! will you believe it??? just a pathetic trickle and then, nothing. i frantically ran around the house trying to turn on all the taps, and it was all the same!
i called dad again and he said he'd check with the guardhouse. and when he call back, what did he tell me? THE MAIN WATER PIPE HAD BURST.
yes, the fricking pipe just burst. BURST, i tell you! how dare the pipe burst when i need water so badly now, how DARE THE PIPE BURST??!?!!?!?!?
i could only make a strangled noise and sputter a bit when dad told me the news.
at this point, i think dad was trying not to laugh cos my day was turning out so
horrifically, but he was like, "you know, it's not so bad lah. just wait it out, they're trying to repair it now."
and i was like "huh! but i have oil all over me and i need to bathe and there are a gazillion plates to wash and i need to wash the clothes that have oil on them and omg dad, how can the pipe burst????????"
and dad had the cheek to suggest i go use the water in the flush system to shower if i really insisted on showering.
i was like "what!" and he snorted and said "then you wait!" before putting down the phone.
ARGHTHEHOUSEISREVOLTINGAGAINSTMEHELPHELPHELPPPPPPPPPPP. i can't drink anything anymore cos i finished up the juice and anyway all i taste is bloody blood (sorry no pun intended i swear) and i daren't go shit even though my stomach's aching like crap (ahahah i promise no pun intended again) cos i'm scared there's not enough water to flush the toilet and i'll have shit swirling around in the toilet bowl if that happens.
i don't even dare to go pee cos i'm scared the pee'll bounce right off the toilet bowl or something cos i dunno, the bowl hates me or something. :(
i'm cold and thirsty but i can't get a blanket or anything cos of all the yucky oil on me!!!!!! i keep thinking i smell rubbish but then i realise it's me and i get even sadder.
what a perfectly horrible 4 hours of Friday this has been. next time i shall stay in bed even longer so less funny things can happen.
okay i mean, it's quite funny when you think back. but i'm not in the mood to laugh now.
supposed to go help clean the retreat house tomorrow for the YM retreat. omg i tell you, i have absolutely zero inclination to clean
anything from now till i dunno, the year 2067. mops, brooms, pots and pans can just stay 100,000miles away from me, thankyou.
