several things have been happening!
bad highlight of the day:i scratched my dad's car today. yes, on the very first time he let me take it out for a spin, too. and ironically, i scratched it while i was trying to park at home. and yes, you saw it right. at
home. how suay is that man. dad was hopping mad when he saw the damage and chewed my ear off pretty darn bad. yelled and yelled and yelled for the longest time ever, and i don't blame him one bit. it was completely my bad and he has every right to be so mad at me. i mean, the repainting job's gonna cost a few hundred bucks. argh i think car spray painters are con-artists. how does a touch-up job even cost close to a hundred bucks? if i had my way i'd spray the scratched bit myself to save him the money but i think he doesn't want me to make the car look like some kid sprayed graffiti all over. looks like i won't be touching the car again for a long long time after this. :( ohwell. i am really sorry, dad.
highlight of the week:similar to the above! except that you know, minus the scratching bit and all, it was pretty exhilirating having the freedom to go anywhere i want without having to take (yucks) public transport. don't get me wrong, i'm no snob. but i value my comfort and time so much that public transport is something i try my hardest to avoid with a vengance.
what else did i do today? had a family bbq and met up with the Cousins again! played soccer with some of the kids after dinner and huffed and puffed my way around the court after a lousy 10min. my kid cousin had the cheek to ask me how come i was so lousy if i was in soccer. heh. then we headed back to my place and played several rounds of Gin Rummy, our favourite Ang game. i suddenly feel so blessed this Christmas by my family. i dunno why i'm suddenly being so sentimental about this all, but i thought about it and realised how blessed we are to have each other as cousins, to share all the laughs with and tears and complaints with (i was uber remorseful about my dad's car throughout the bbq).
the car-scratch incident today made me think about how my dad loves me so much that he forgives me so freely, even when number one, it's so obviously my fault, and number two, even when what i've done has upset him so much. as long as i'm willing to admit that i've been in the wrong and i come back to him not with defiance but with remorse, he'll forgive me with a big hug. and i think God's like that too, isn't He? only on a greater scale because His love for us is limitless and He's like that for ALL of us. when i do something that's wrong and hurtful to God, He still forgives me when i've come to my senses and i'm sorry. and my dad, like my Heavenly Father, even feels bad for scolding me so badly when he was caught up in his anger and apologises. God felt bad that He destroyed the world with the flood and promised Noah never to do something so destructive ever again, sending a rainbow across the sky as a sign of that promise. i can't believe i never saw God's ability to forgive in such a light before. it just shows that it takes daily incidents in my life for God's goodness to be revealed to me.
i've been so caught up with the actual doing of things for Christmas this year that upon reflecting on it all while i was in the shower just now with the hot water running, i feel a lot like A Martha. Martha, as in the Martha in the Mary and Martha in the Bible. she was so absorbed in getting everything right in the material, practical sense that she failed to just sit at the feet of Jesus and enjoy His company. similarly, i feel like i'm missing the meaning behind all the gift-buying and card-writing. Christmas is essentially a season of love. so am i getting the essence of Christmas right? i wasn't, i think. but after realising it, i've been able to realign myself and my thoughts and i think it's better now. as in, i know why i'm writing cards to people, i wanna tell them that they're much loved by God and hence, loved by me too. same goes for the gifts.
some cards are harder to write than others, though. not that i don't have anything to say, but the hardest cards to write are those to whom i have a gazillion things to say but i just don't know how to say it, or how to even start. i am called to love everyone, even those who don't love me. but so damn hard! really! i'm no saint, but i try so hard and i hope and hope the trying'll pay off.
i am completely tired.
oh and on a side-note, i'll be extracting my wisdom teeth soon! yay, finally! on the 5th of Jan, just before school begins! i'm quite excited cos i've been wanting to remove them since like, forever. on the other hand, i know it's quite silly, but i'm slightly scared cos what if i don't wake up from the anaesthetic? going under GA isn't exactly the funnest thing. or what if i lose my sense of taste or feeling in my mouth cos my surgeon told me that there's that risk involved? methinks these worries are rather unfounded, but sigh i dunno. nevermind! shouldn't think about all these now!
Christmas is coming soon! i am getting excited!
i think i shall play a game of Spider Solitaire in its medium mode with two suits and a bit of Sims2 before i plop on my bed and am lost to the world. been starting to keep up with daily QT again recently. my spiritual diary's filled with a lot of ramblings and questions that pop up as i read the Bible or just pray in the quiet of my room. it's better than an empty diary i think, heh.
toodles, world!
